“As children learn responsibly to control their feelings, they are no longer controlled BY those feelings.”
(Landreth, 2002)
Play Therapy
Among many benefits play has for children, communication and self-expression using therapeutic toys and resources supported by a trusting relationship in a safe environment is the main feature of play therapy. Play Therapy is a gradual process resulting in changes of behaviour, attitudes and growth with long lasting outcomes.
By engaging in play, the child releases the unpleasant thoughts suppressed in the subconscious and brings these forward into the conscious. Once the chaotic and difficult thoughts arise, the child learns to understand their experiences, accept the situation and make sense of it. When the children are aware and understand their thoughts, they gradually build up capacities to face their challenges and to cope with them.
Play Therapy can start approaching to end when the child is: less dependent, less confused, expresses himself safely and openly, expresses anger appropriately, accepts responsibility for own behaviours, initiates activities with assurance and the child’s play has direction.
As the overwhelming feelings or thoughts are abstract, play gives us space to explore in a safer way, without words. Children are happier and feel safer when they know that their internal chaos is understood.
Tips to Best Support The Child in Therapy
(BAPT)
We work together in supporting your child through the process.
• Be consistent and encouraging to your child about attending sessions regularly.
• Resist the urge to ask your child what they did, as this will put pressure on them to comment on something they may have difficulty understanding themselves.
• Please don't ask your child to 'be good' or check they have been. Therapy is not about being 'good' or 'bad' and your child must feel free to express 'bad' feelings in an uncensored way.
• Don't insist for your child to tell certain things: it is their time and they must feel free to express themselves at their own pace. Instead tell your concerns to the Play Therapist on a separate occasion.
• Play can be messy and it is helpful if your child can wear old clothes to minimise their anxiety about this.
• During any therapeutic intervention behaviour may appear to get worse before it gets better - please tell me if you have any concerns. Please also feel free to ask any questions throughout the process.
Why Play Therapy Should Not Be Rushed
Sometimes, the therapy process might appear to be progressing slower than expected. This is because the process matches how children heal and communicate naturally. Play therapy works best when it unfolds at the child’s own pace, not as a prescribed agenda. Rushing can undermine the goals it’s meant to achieve.
Progress in therapy often looks like small shifts over time rather than quick breakthroughs. Children communicate differently than adults. Instead of talking directly about feelings, they often express themselves through play, symbols, and repetition. In approaches like Play Therapy, a child might revisit the same scenario again and again before they’re ready to move forward. That repetition isn’t “stuckness”, it’s processing. If they are hurried, it is likely that the process will be interrupted.
Children need to feel safe, accepted, and in control before they reveal deeper emotions or experiences. Play therapy gives children a sense of control, something they may lack in other parts of their lives. Rushing can make them feel pressured or misunderstood, which may raise their anxieties, or cause them to withdraw or resist.
